Friday, November 28, 2014

Atari emulator -> Arex

I used to play this one a lot with an actual Atari computer... for some reason, I seem to recall flipping the score twice!  When did I have all that free time?  Maybe I left the computer on overnight or something.  In order to do that, by my hasty calculations... why, you'd have to get to level 241 to do that!  Well, I guess I found such endeavours less boring back then.  Nowadays, I'm in a rush, more or less... but God bless the geniuses who created the ability to save the game state.  Now I always make sure to restart whenever I lose a life.
Anyway, I tried organizing the levels by theme; a little pointless, arguably.  There are some thematic similarities, some that are completely out there.  That level 31 reminds me of that one challenging room in that Montezuma's Revenge, Part 1 game.

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Atari emulator -> Fortune Hunter

I'm just a sucker for tempests in a teapot like Romox's "Fortune Hunter"... then again, I'm also relieved I didn't spend $39.95 for it back in the day thirty years ago.  For those of you who want to know what computer speed was like back then, this is a great example.  Graphics 7 was a particularly slow mode.  Sure, not as slow as 8, but still.  This kinda reminds me of "Temple of Apshai", the one that you had to run in Basic, and not "Gateway to Apshai," which was larger in scope by far.  The closest thing we had to Doom for the Atari was "Encounter" by Synapse Software.  Not as violent, anyhow.

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Another one

And the tits just keep on coming... hits!  I mean hits.  First of all... they can't use the name "Under Siege"!  There's only one Under Siege, God damn it... oh, right, there's a second one too.  And second... she's supposed to be a damsel in distress, right?  She don't look very distressed! ..are they trying to get some kind of freaky three-way going, like Stephen Colbert's always talking about?

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

General War: Memories

Mostly the happy memories, apparently......................

Megalegs (Atari emulator and non)

Ah, Megalegs by Megasoft.  Wonder whatever happened to Megasoft?  Guess their lawyers weren't as good as Microsoft.  Ah, Microsoft.  Reminds me of that David Letterman joke in one of his top 10 lists.  I believe it was Top 10 Bill Gates pickup lines.  Number one, of course, was "It's not micro, and it's not soft."  Good ol' creepy, undersexed Uncle Dave.  Anyway, back to the game proper.
When you play one of the classic games with the three lives paradigm, like Centipede or Pac-Man, is it just me or do you ever notice that you seem to do well on the first life, then really blow it on the second and third lives?  Man, does that seem to happen to me a lot.  Of course, with Megalegs, it's way way harder to get to those extra lives unlike on Centipede or Millipede.  There's a totally different points structure in Megalegs.  Things are worth a lot fewer points, to say the least.  For example, with Centipede, you can shoot twelve scorpions and boom!  Extra life.  Of course, in Megalegs, there are turtles instead of scorpions, and I believe they are worth 150 points a pop.  Now, if I've done my math correctly, that's... 66.66667 turtles!  How do you get a fraction of a turtle?  Doesn't make any sense!  They do poison only half of the mushroom sometimes, on the other hand.
Other differences: the fleas fall pretty much nonstop in Megalegs.  Sometimes in Centipede, they let up, don't they?  Unless it's the Atari 8-bit version of Centipede, of course.  Fleas are only worth 25 points, so again, you've got your work cut out for you.  Now, as in Centipede, the fleas lay the occasional new mushroom.  Let's just skip that extra chapter of the book on the Birds and the Bees for now.  Here's another difference from Centipede and definitely Millipede: if the fleas reach the maximum number of mushrooms on the screen, they stop... kinda creepy, dontcha think?  The playing field has now become a bar with a maximum occupancy!  Why didn't we listen to the Luddites?
One other difference between Megalegs and Centipede is that, once the megalegs hits the bottom of the screen, nothing happens.  In Centipede, new centipede heads start appearing from offscreen.  They spared us the indignity of that extra burden in Megalegs.  Kinda neat!
Then, of course, there's the spiders.  Reminds me of having to do the jump rope in grade school.  You gotta time it just right when you jump into the Ellipsoid of Death.  Never did get good at that.  Of course, the "spiders" in Megalegs have much more predictable movements.  And yet, they still get me a lot.  I guess my fate in life is to fall prey to one psychopath or sociopath or another.  Maybe the video games help stave off that fate.  I know that video games are going to be cruel to me, but I can at least control the extent of the cruelty sometimes!
Now, if I were a really smart player, I'd just stay on level 1 and shoot everything while it's nice and slow, but I just can't operate that way.  Can't.  Can't do it.  I need progress.  Which brings us to the sound effects of Megalegs.  I never really thought about it before, but there's no crunch or crash or explosion sounds, unlike Centipede and Millipede!  What's THAT all about?  Guess it's starting to bother me now!  Also, I noticed that sometimes after you shoot a poisoned mushroom, the space where it was is still poisoned, so when the megalegs hits it, then down to the bottom right away it comes.  Sloppy programming, Dubno.  Sloppy programming.
Okay, I think that that's all the witty and perceptive observations I had about Megalegs.  Back to Candy Crunch, as my brother calls it!

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Atari emulator -> Cannibals

In a blogger's typical haste, I was going to call this the worst game ever, but then I forgot how much I absolutely hate Crypts of Plumbous.  I went on the internet to try and figure out this game, because I didn't realize that you're supposed to hit the things on the head after they get stuck in the holes you dig.  Now I love this game!  Any game that advocates blunt force trauma to someone's head can't be all bad, right?  Still, there's something that bothers me... 115 points per bad guy?  Really?  Seriously?  Bet there's a story behind that!  Probably the guy's room number at college or sumpthing.

2/15/'21 - He did live at 119 John Bright Street!  Maybe his true love lived at 115 John Bright St.  Note to future self: you hit things on the head with the trigger button (0 on the numpad), and you've got about 0.7 seconds in which to do it... innit?  A game of slow action otherwise.  Semi-intriguing contrast in this variation of... Burgertime?  Apple Panic?  Mr. Do's Castle?

Sunday, November 9, 2014

Compete against millions!

Somehow I need better odds than that.  Something depressing about coming in 500,000th place.  But somehow I don't think I'm the only one.  All those poker players on the TV who don't make it into the bubble?  Oh, there's some bitter tears there, lemme tell ya!  In fact, I've never seen an unsore loser on any of these poker TV shows, come to think of it!